A reflection of past months - and what to do ahead

It has been a long while since I have posted...

Time to update again though...there are some thoughts in my mind that I can only best jot them down in this 'space' which I call my own.

The past 2 years have been brought about several realisations as I finally realise what it means to juggle work and a family - with two young girls.

However, if I were to try to sum up the lessons I have learnt, here are the following:

- Family: It is taxing to take care of children if you are not mentally prepared for the time taken to pay attention to their needs and to ensure their development. On that count I can say that I have not done that too well and will try to push myself to get them to learn more. This i think stems from my approach as a fierce disciplinarian. Yan Jun and I frequently get into squabbles over them because of the approach - i insist on tough love to get things through and for them to learn. I probably have to do more myself to get the girls to try new things.

- Work: The past 2 years have been a miserable experience to say the least as I have been kind of chucked to the side again. I cannot complain much but one thing I know is that if my 'office ego' has been hurt and I am disregarded as a fellow colleague - then its time to say goodbye. I do not want to say which colleague has made me this angry now - but trust me - I will say it in the coming year - as soon as I shift to a new career. For now I am looking to something new and I am pulling all stops to make sure THAT HAPPENS SOONER rather than later.

- Myself: I realise that my general health has suffered for the past 2 years. That is for sure since I have felt more lethargic and have fallen sick more often. Furthermore, not to mention that I have also felt more emotionally down but that can again be explained from work. I am trying ways to destress and make myself feel better again but I guess its not working. I realise that I have to break out of my comfort zone and see what works out for me - at the end I need to be happy both physically and emotionally.

It is ridiculous summing up everything which i have left out other things, most importantly:
- the vacations: two trips to Australia (Perth 2015 and Melbourne 2016), and one to Taiwan (TaipeI - Taizhong 2016)
- meet ups with friends which did and did not work out (including a self-initiated PS gathering)
- enrichment lessons for the kids (Xuan is actually going for 3 different classes and keeping her interest in all of them which continues to marvel me; but the same cannot be said for Jia)

Moving forward, I only have 1 goal for 2017: Settle my career direction.

The divination lot that I drew at a temple says my mood so well: Stuck in the middle of nowhere and looking to heavens for help.

Time to push for light at the end of the tunnel - no matter what it takes.

With the support of my wife, kids and the gods.

2013 - Memorable and not-so-meomorable things...and things to do/ look forward in 2014

It has been a year since my last post...so let's get started..

But before I start, if you are reading this post, I welcome and thank you for taking some time to read the thoughts of an 'everyday person'....

2013 has been a year of various ups and downs - probably more downs than ups...but let me just provide a roundup of all the major things I have experienced that have made my life change as it did time and again...

Impact of work changes - I have said this before and will say it again - I am not happy at whatever I have had to experience because of re-organisation changes. I am not resistant to change but it is very obvious that whatever that I have done is probably not recognised much by my own bosses, not even to say of my colleagues in other places. It is much so that I get ignored whatever I do, and I have to work doubly hard just to stay relevant and tell everyone that 'hey, I am still here'. Even so, it seems like this status will not change and I will have to do more of the same and try to up my game. Things have worsened between me and my bosses also because of other things I have had to do outside of my job scope, (or ECAs), and while those have made senior management happy and more receptive to what I have said, my own bosses feel that I am sacrificing my work because of them. It's ridiculous as I cannot not give my effort just because its an ECA - it will be totally unprofessional of me to do that. Still, changing jobs is probably not possible for 2014, but I am on the lookout for that remote possibility...who knows?

Family - Me and my wife welcomed our little baby girl early this year...and its fair to say that we are learning how to best take care of her and ourselves every day. But still, we love her all the same and she lights up our day and takes the stress away from our minds with her smiles, cries and cheekiness... I am thankful that she has come to our world for she has provided an added dimension into our lives, even though this has meant my life has revolved around her almost, if not, all the time. Allow me to say here that my daughter and my wife are the most precious to me, and I love them both. And we managed to take a trip to Adelaide which we enjoyed ourselves too...

Studies - Yup, those who know me well know that I have always thought of studying again...so I thought, why not now when I have the chance? So this time round I decided to register and study - while I know mentally that I can still handle the stresses of work and family for now... So RSIS it was, and I just finished my first trimester and mid-way into my 2nd as at this point of time. It is definitely not as smooth-sailing as I thought but no way to complain now - might as well enjoy the thrill of studying again as I try to re-ignite my interest in current affairs and strategic thinking - also simply because work does not allow me to enjoy as it should be...

Friends - I admit that its a lot harder to meet friends following the birth of my daughter...but I thank everyone for their understanding. I apologise for those whose weddings that I could not attend and congratulate personally...but at least I made it for one of my 'brother's - so my congrats again to Jianwu and Ariel! =D
I consider myself lucky to meet up with some friends whom I have not met for a while (Jaclyn - yup I am talking about you...hope to catch up with you soon again =) ) As for the rest, as usual I will plan something on the pipeline...stay posted...

I will not mention about world goings-on because they are covered already - but I will definitely will make comments for one - Edward Snowden. I will say that I understand where he comes from, and regards himself as a hero - but it is precisely of what he thought of today's world of intelligence that has given bad guys and terrorists a leg up in creating criminal and terrorist acts. Things work against them because law enforcement agencies must think like them and act against them - this is a basic principle of survival and security. By doing what he did, Snowden has given the advantage to these criminals as they do not need to play to the rules of 'transparency' and 'accountability' - I hope the world is not put at risk because of what he did, but he is, and will always be - a guy who will earn nothing but total disrespect from me. Period.

Now on to some things I will want to achieve in 2014...

1. Re-work my fortunes at work and get some respect and acknowledgement from my bosses..

2. Work harder in making my family and happy...

3. Achieve my goals for studies..

4. And stay physically fitter and learner if can...

Happy new year and a happy 2014!

2012 - A year of celebration and reflection

I know I have not updated for a long, long while...so here comes the time which I know I must update again - because it is the time for pause and reflection for what has been the most momentous year possibly in my whole life. Really.

And to say that it is the most momentous year in my life does not even do it justice. It is THE Year for me - period.

Just to highlight key incidents that have shaped 2012 for me personally:

Reorganisation of work...

I cannot say too much here - just that work wise I am being forced to change job scopes again similar to my previous one. I cannot say that I am too happy by that because I was just starting to get comfortable with my current responsibilities so therefore I have to admit I did not take it very nicely. After all - it was supposedly seamless with the rest as it meant a continuation of what they did or not too alien transformation - but for me I have to add a new dimension and drop another to my work. I have to admit changing my mindset is not easy - but I am trying my best.

The only I know is that either I adapt fast enough or I will probably get the boot soon enough - period.
Tying the Knot =D

This is what makes 2012 the year for me personally. For it to come to fruition in April 2012 encapsulates the preparation me and my fiance (now wife) undertook for a year - from the time we got engaged we had literally spent one year to formulate on finalising and carrying out the traditional procedures in declaring us husband and wife for the rest of our lives. Although I would have liked to invite all that I know to my wedding, it was tempered that some of my best friends could not attend because of other commitments - I find that the only disappointment otherwise. Of course everything went well and on schedule - for a time control freak like me it sure all went to perfection as nothing was left to chance. And I am sure happy that everything at the dinner went well - bar one slide for my 'special segment' to surprise my wife...but the song which I rehearsed for the past fortnight by singing myself on the road from her home to mine worked fine.

At the end, I just want to thank Thomas, Yong Keong, Eddy, Jianwu, Shennon and Kelvin for giving me their greatest support and assistance for my wedding  - without you guys it would never have worked out the way me and my wife would have wanted...

The journey of a lifetime (very likely)

I can only say that I had not planned for a vacation with my wife for this long - obviously such a vacation for a long time can only be done once - so it was a trip for the ages :)

The trip round Central Europe was quite a trip - considering that me and my wife toured several cities within a month - 10 cities in 7 countries to be exact. It was quite the backpackers trip as we travelled light and saved quite a lot - most of what we brought back were gone as they were all food and sweets...but we sure have a lot of wonderful memories as we spent invaluable time with the just the two of us at a place which we probably may not return again...So that kind of experience is hard to replicate essentially.

Searching myself - to study again

Still I have wondered about my own goals in life and what I really wanted to do - and one of the goals I had was to study again. Knowing that my career is about set now unless I can make a drastic change, I decided to pursue the one other option that I can do - which is to study again. However, after attending a briefing at the instutiton and meeting up with one of my cohort mates which was totally unexpected, I have to comment that trying to do that has now come into direct conflict with my job as it is just impossible to sacrifice time from work to study. That is something that no employer can compromise on - which is totally reasonable.

As of now I am still submitting my application but I have not decided on what to do yet - the most likely option is to appeal for a delay in entry while I try to work out approval on this - otherwise I may resign and take the risk to try for a better career elsewhere - but that is a tricky proposition.

At the same time, I am also trying to do simple things which I liked to do which I find less time to do for various reasons - watching a movie, singing at KTV, having lunch with friends... some of them which I manage to do, but some of which I could not. But the key lesson is this - sometimes its doing the simple things again which bring the most fun - one does not need to travel far and do something extreme to refresh himself, but more of doing things that were done before again can help to change the perspective of life's priorities. At least I know what my priorities are and what I want to do...

At least for next year I know that there are more things to come - personally for me there will be something big, but not sure for work wise though - but as the world continues to revolve amidst new political developments, some of which are not so good. Still, the least we can do is to stay optimistic, do what we can and hope for the best - and take whatever comes our way.

All the best for 2013 =D

Photos of Trip to Taiwan (January 2011) =D

Capturing the CNY mood before take-off to Taipei...


Landed - at Taipei Train Station for the very first train journey to Hualien =)

First meal - a Taiwanese Bian Dang (modelled after the Bento) - made popular especially in the 1960s...


Some pictures of scenery of northern Taiwan as the train continues to run along - it will take 3 hours before we got there...

Finally! - At Hualien Train Station (In Chinese)

Hualien as a town itself is peaceful and quiet - especially so in the mornings - and we then move along for our tour or Taroko Gorge ( or Tai Lu Ge in Chinese)...


A look at the mountains around Hualien - a preview of what's to come at Taroko...



A first peek at Taroko as we reach after a 30min drive...

Stopped for a change of helmets - a dead must because of the real threat of rockslides - the guide mentioned that the most recent rockslide happened just 9 months ago - killing 12 tourists alive...

A view of the mountains upwards...

And a view of the river that runs below...

At Kaohsiung - at the hotel I was going to stay for the 2 nights...

Taking the Metro to Lui He Night Market - very similar to our own MRT....

The sign to Liu He...

And finally - yay! Personally for me this marks my return to here after 7 years - the last time I was here was during NS.... haha =)

And a picture of us both - haha I won't show the food eaten here - but do try the delicacies (chicken chop, stinky tofu, dumplings etc =) )

At entrance of Cheng Qing Hu...

Update (November 2011)

It has been quite a long while since I posted here – the only explanation I can give is that I have been too busy to look at it...

But yet still I try to look for an opportunity to update – today happens to be one such day which I can talk about what happened since the last time I wrote... I shall try to stick to the usual proceedings =)

First things – work updates. I have changed my workplace – after spending two and a half years at a place in Upper Changi Road North near Selarang Camp... I always wondered how would I feel as I would send the final email that would tell all the peeps that I am gone and thanks for everything. My feelings on that day – and I would not forget that day – were mixed. This was largely because while I could finally say adios, I had to stay for a very long while to do so. When I did type that email – I sent it at nearly 10.30pm. That wraps up the way I entered and left Prisons – alone when I came in, alone when I went off.

And now I am at a new place at Novena which the work culture is decidedly better – I suppose it is a whole new change of environment – with different bosses, a different working culture and different set of colleagues. Having to work in an environment which bosses and colleagues are female in majority is a challenge – that is a marked departure from the previous environment which is all male. Still, that has to be accepted given the fact that there are generally more females in the workforce. I suppose the new found independence which I am given to complete my taskings is also something which I treasure now, but now expected to manage better. Its a steep curve to learn which I am supposed to help as soon as I can – and I admit that I am just trying to learn as much as I can while trying to be an effective contributor as well. Coupled with a change of bosses (yes, yet again similar to Prisons after a few months) and it all becomes a bit trickier. But there is only one direction – forward. And forward I will go to achieve better results.

Secondly – home issues. My nephew has mastered the ability to walk – and he cannot stop walking. He somehow derives the fun and joy when walking such that he will laugh and keep going around to the same places and then mutter something else. But I am quite sure he will be able to master the art of talking as well – and I can see that he will be quite a chatterbox – like me when I was a kid =D However all this is tempered by the fact that my grandfather is not feeling well – and that he is generally very weak. This may have come partly due to longstanding back and neck pains which have hurt his appetite as he consumes less and less despite the best efforts of my grandmother and my mum in making him eat. Seriously, I hope that he lives well to see my big day next year....I truly hope he does.

Lastly – this leads up to – yup, myself and my fiancée. We finally had our luck with our flat application as we managed to get our flat at what we think is an excellent location – the only downside is that it is near the ground floor... But nothing is perfect in this world – so we will take it anyway.

Before I proceed on, the reason to why I have mentioned fiancée is because – yup, I have proposed =). Should clarify that as I did not mention it in my previous post – actually I did it sometime back....

Yup then on we already went to settle other things...the hotel’s done and dusted – as in admin wise, while we are busy with the photoshoot. All things smooth, we should be able to resolve that by next month. Therefore the only thing that remains will be to settle things for the actual day and honeymoon...which I don’t think I can mention yet until the end of the year...

And yes, I missed the IPT training deadline for my IPPT – that means I have to train on my own and try to pass IPPT – and I have only 2 months to do it. Still, given the fact that I have been on an extensive training and gym program which I have lost considerable weight (no, not kidding – 10 kgs of it) – I hope to clear that asap. Otherwise, it will be quite a major issue.

Will be in Korea this coming Sunday for a week – I will update with photos and a post trip report =)

To sign off – here are some pictures of the trip in Taiwan that I did not post (yup I know it is super overdue...) - I will post up the link in the next few days...

Mid 2011 - elections and work and everything else...

It has been a long while since I updated my blog here - but several things have happened since the last time I updated here - here goes then...

A first overseas break in more than a year brought me to Taiwan - long overdue I think - but it was a good trip all the same - went on a hectic round the island trip encompassing Taipei, Hualien, Green Island, Kaohsiung and Alishan. More pictures on this can be found on my facebook profile, and definitely with my beloved with me it was all the more sweeter. We sure experienced a lot of good food, good scenery and comfortable rooms as well - especially with the mountainous ranges in Taroko and Alishan, and with the city fun in Taipei and Kaohsiung. We even had fun exploring Qijin in Kaohsiung on a bike which broke down on our way back =) The only regret that we had was that we were unable to see the sunrise in Alishan which was spoiled by a heavy mist. But in conclusion, we decided that we would come back to Taiwan soon - but not sure when...

But the trip back home brought about a bout of gastric flu to me which did not make me enjoy CNY then - but anyway I suppose it is easy for one to pick up illnesses from another country and suffer so..yeah...

Next up is on work which I will probably move on to a new place soon - but the only problem to that is that I am rushing to tidy up a lot of things before handing over and moving to a new location soon. It is still ongoing, and my scheduled time has been delayed to two weeks from now. At this time, my move has been overshadowed by the posting of my colleague which undoubtedly she has done a lot better than me - so she will be missed. Not that I care much though - I intend to carry my lessons learnt to my new place which I aim to do better. Anyway, my new workplace happens to be at Novena - so thank goodness I need not travel so far...

Following up then is the elections just concluded yesterday. Campaigning and publicity for various candidates had been ongoing for a very long time - for myself I took the time to enjoy the mood by attending several rallies - including rallies in my constitutency which had not been contested in 20 years. I will not comment more on the candidates as there are a lot of posts that can found elsewhere, but the conclusion of this is that this is a watershed for Singapore politics and nation-building - with the rise of the post 70 and 80-ers the perception of good governance will differ, and this is here to stay.

On home issues, celebrating the birthday of my nephew was a big thing - he sure can talk and has grown teeth - but he has also grown very stubborn as well - and clamours after my parents who dote him a lot - obviously...haha... but I love him all the same =)

Finally, with my beloved - I suppose the only thing I can say is that we can say is that things have picked up a lot more quickly for us both... mainly because we are pragmatists haha... we have sped up applying for a lot of things and bought some stuff as well...and things have not ended for us yet. Obviously we have experienced our highs and lows especially with the HDB - but life moves on... Will update as soon as there are developments =D

Ok...that's all from me...hopefully more of the good and less of the bad for the rest of the year will do me just fine =)

Outstanding things to consider end 2010...and some updates...

It is so soon that the year is coming to an end... so far it has been a year which for various reasons I would like to treasure and forget...but more of that in the year end review post coming soon =)

Probably the biggest thing on my mind is my own posting issue which I dearly hope would be settled in the coming fornight - it all started in May when my bosses told me indirectly to f*** off and relocate to a new place instead - this has contributed to me thinking about moving places already. To tell the truth, I am not sure what lies ahead - but I am considering all possibilities - including that of quitting and moving elsewhere albeit in a lower position, with lower pay and stuff. It has surely been not quite what I expected and was mentally ready for. But - I will still take what chances come and make the best of them. Period. I guess it is pointless to grouse about bad bosses, backstabbing and politics - the truth is that they happen everywhere.

Now on to a personal issue which I am more concerned about than work at least - my mum's impending surgery. I am awaiting a final confirmation on when surgery will be done, and when. The fact that she may have to lie prone for some time after surgery most definitely means that I will spend the bulk of my leave to manage her recovery. For sure. Though I will sacrifice it for a year end vacation which I planned way beforehand - family matters come on top of everything else.

Some positive news - my nephew has shown rapid growth these past few months - he is already able to crawl, and is attempting to walk and talk. Just last Friday he sounded very animated when my girlfriend came along - and he was talking to her and my dad non stop - seems like he is able to call 'mum' and 'dad' soon....haha...

In the meantime, I attended the wedding of one of my best friends and mentor - I consider her a mentor as she has been advising me on a lot of things on everything - and given me a lot of support as well - I wish the best for her in a long and loving marriage. And not to forget that I went with my pals on a trip to Genting which reminded of the last time I went there was so long ago... then I realised that the poor state of Genting shows the backwardness of Malaysia in regards to Singapore's development in the past 10 years...sigh...

And as for me and my girlfriend - both of us have started to plan for other things now...things that will take shape hopefully soon. But the most important thing is that both of us have had our families' support and recognition - that will go a long way in making things better for us =D.

For some news and sports issues - here is what is on my mind the past 3-4 months:

- DPRK's leadership succession and nuclear proliferation: If KJL's son does learn the lessons of Castro's successor and wake up to realities - there may be a way out for DPRK in its international survival. But then again, some people comment that that may be hard to realise since the country has been banking on the principle of brinksmanship based on its nuclear capability... much more remains to be seen.

- Changing tide in US politics - The thrashing of the Democrats in the mid term elections shows that somehow the American people may be expecting too much too quickly out of the Obama administration. I worry that conservativeness of the people through the Republican 'Tea Party' may wreck the global leadership capability of the American economy - that remains to be seen...

- Health of MM Lee with death of his wife - I wish for the best of health of MM Lee...and sincere condolences to him for the passing of Mdm Kwa...

- Singapore Impending GE - With the redrawing of electoral boundaries to consider more SMCs, this might be a response for more electoral participation by the voters - I am sceptical of the fact that with more opposition candidates fielded, this will in turn cause a major political shift - in any sense I expect the status quo to remain due to the huge portion of the 1st and 2nd generation peoples of the nation.

- Japan-China squabble on Senkaku Islands dispute - It must be acknowledged that one day China will assert its power on this issue economically or militarily as shown on this case. China's retaliation throught the restriction of export of rare materials shows that it can now influence global economic and political power play - not to be underestimated.

- Sports Wise....here's the following:

1. Liverpool's fall from grace - Feels like it is a nightmare - but one that they are slowly climbing out of. But if its 2-0 win over Chelsea is any indication - then it should make an assault back to the top...

2. Ferrari trying to seize WDC again - If Alonso can do a Raikkonen in 2007 - he will be a genius - no less. That is because everything dumped him out of the equation save myself and the tifosi fans haha...

3. LA Lakers becoming champs and the three peat attempt, and Miami's new 3-some: The Lakers stand a good chance of the 3-peat simply because they do what they need to do - no-nonsense, and effectively.

4. Tiger Woods - Good luck to him...it may be a long while before he can get that No. 1 ranking, and his golfing swagger back - though his reputation will be in tatters foreever. It is a sobering message to remind all that moral discipline is key above all other things you do - it haunts you if you do not comply by them.

9 months...and 3 months more...

It sure is a more tiring year for 2010....in general.

Simply because of the fact that I have made less postings here than I did last year.

But now I am trying to send one here while I am taking a break off work - and it comes ironically due to my forgetfulness in bringing my wallet for lunch - but anyway...

For work now I am trying to sort things out - looking elsewhere for options here and there, but it seems like the job market is slowing down...not sure if this is because of concerns over the global economy - something tells me that we are going into economic uncertainty again. And this means that my own career is again looking to enter another rocky path. Sighz - only when I am hoping for a good way out of this - but it seems that the tunnel is getting longer again.

Probably one positive thing to happen though is my nephew - he's the bubbly guy that lights everyone up whenever he comes to visit in the weekend - Recently we had a birthday celebration for my dad which highlighted the 'star' he is - haha... but we all admit that with him around it makes things less miserable for us all.

And not to forget that I myself do have someone to talk, spend time with and love as well... Just to carry off from a few blog posts ago - yup the one who celebrated my birthday with happens to be my girlfriend...and hopefully my last. I am thankful that she is there to counsel, support and understand me these past few months - that I greatly appreciate. For without her probably I will not even know how I would have lasted until now... To her I just want to say:

' Thanks for being around with me, and for understanding, caring and supporting me always. For without you around I would not know what happiness means... and how to make the best out of everything. I wish that we can walk this road together - today, tomorrow...and as long as we can...

Love - Alvin.'