A reflection of past months - and what to do ahead

It has been a long while since I have posted...

Time to update again though...there are some thoughts in my mind that I can only best jot them down in this 'space' which I call my own.

The past 2 years have been brought about several realisations as I finally realise what it means to juggle work and a family - with two young girls.

However, if I were to try to sum up the lessons I have learnt, here are the following:

- Family: It is taxing to take care of children if you are not mentally prepared for the time taken to pay attention to their needs and to ensure their development. On that count I can say that I have not done that too well and will try to push myself to get them to learn more. This i think stems from my approach as a fierce disciplinarian. Yan Jun and I frequently get into squabbles over them because of the approach - i insist on tough love to get things through and for them to learn. I probably have to do more myself to get the girls to try new things.

- Work: The past 2 years have been a miserable experience to say the least as I have been kind of chucked to the side again. I cannot complain much but one thing I know is that if my 'office ego' has been hurt and I am disregarded as a fellow colleague - then its time to say goodbye. I do not want to say which colleague has made me this angry now - but trust me - I will say it in the coming year - as soon as I shift to a new career. For now I am looking to something new and I am pulling all stops to make sure THAT HAPPENS SOONER rather than later.

- Myself: I realise that my general health has suffered for the past 2 years. That is for sure since I have felt more lethargic and have fallen sick more often. Furthermore, not to mention that I have also felt more emotionally down but that can again be explained from work. I am trying ways to destress and make myself feel better again but I guess its not working. I realise that I have to break out of my comfort zone and see what works out for me - at the end I need to be happy both physically and emotionally.

It is ridiculous summing up everything which i have left out other things, most importantly:
- the vacations: two trips to Australia (Perth 2015 and Melbourne 2016), and one to Taiwan (TaipeI - Taizhong 2016)
- meet ups with friends which did and did not work out (including a self-initiated PS gathering)
- enrichment lessons for the kids (Xuan is actually going for 3 different classes and keeping her interest in all of them which continues to marvel me; but the same cannot be said for Jia)

Moving forward, I only have 1 goal for 2017: Settle my career direction.

The divination lot that I drew at a temple says my mood so well: Stuck in the middle of nowhere and looking to heavens for help.

Time to push for light at the end of the tunnel - no matter what it takes.

With the support of my wife, kids and the gods.