Are there any 'lousy' people?

I suddenly came to this thought, even though I am not feeling well right now, because there is more than one instance where I hear of my friends calling their own committee members and friends 'not up to standard', ' low calibre', 'lousy', 'cannot make it', and a lot more...

As a person who has to fight through everything from scratch, I am quite offended by these remarks.

Just to clarify, in my own opinion, no one is 'lousy', ' low calibre', 'cannot make it' and what have you. As the Chinese sayings go that there is an expert for every field of work, and every dog has its day, the point that I want to make is that we do not deserve to judge anyone as lousy, or having no potential whatsoever.

The critical issue, in which so many of us forget, is to try and help them and us look out for the one special thing that each and every one of us can excel in.

In fact those who call these remarks should retract those derogatory and demoralising phrases. Because we all start from scratch somewhere. Take my ex classmate for example who started from scratch after O levels but has finally carved out a career for himself and is doing very well.

So the moral of the story: Before you even think of saying these words, think about yourself in their shoes and ask yourself if you can do better than them. If you can, help them out, or do their work to prove a point. Otherwise, it is best not to say it.

Uneasiness...and a confession

I had an uneasy few days now to say the very least.

For the need to settle outstanding CCA matters, I have just about incurred the wrath of the rest who have wanted to see things but so far had not happened.

There is worse to come though, but the consolating part of it all is that it should be settled by 1st September 2006. Anyhow, that is.

A good friend of mine showed me a message that was sent by my ex boss, and while he told me how saddened it was, I was not surprised to say the least. Well, as I told him, for this issue, I way suspected her motives all the while long when all this started. Because I think I was the only one who saw that she was not doing the project for the love of it, rather, she wants to do it well so as to further her agenda forward…or so it may or may not seem.

This is sad because in my opinion, that equals to telling me that I have wasted a lot of precious time being miserable and yet kept alive only by the passion that has kept me going…Then I asked myself this question again:

So what are my priorities this time around? What is it that I really like to do?

What is my ultimate dream activity that I want to organise for myself here?

After considering it over the weekend, I have come to a decision. Suddenly, I feel at peace with myself.

To all my friends out there who think who have not gained anything beneficial or enjoyed your university life because you have been doing things that had not been to your liking, my advice is leave and really invest time in doing what you love and want to do.

Because it is from what you love doing that you also learn the most out of what you want to achieve. Trust me.

Finally, I have dedicated this final paragraph to one special person who I know I truly love…

To this special one…it has been a special way of knowing you for the past 13 months…I do not know what eventually led us to this, but I can only say that fate has gotten us together. The very fact that we have stuck through after several of our own tribulations shows that this is meant to last, and I truly hope that you can truly consider it and walk this next road of my life together with me. I suppose this is an open declaration of love, I admit, but due to the special circumstances of it, I know this is my most sincere way of telling you that I am ready for anything that comes. I have seen a lot of relationships spark and fizzle out, but I really hope that ours will always burn with passion and love.

In any case, I just want to say: I truly like you and will stick out with you for anything and through anything.

For all the rest of you guys out there, this may seem stupid to you, but just take it that you are reading this from a guy that has learnt to cherish everything that he knows must be hold tight and close…for so many things have happened in this world that have made me learn to be more protective of what I truly believe and treasure in…especially this.

Love, Alvin.

Lessons...2 years on...

I always thought that I have done everything that I could in my ability and cannot do anymore further...

But I learnt a few lessons this week. Lessons that taught me how to judge myself in the face of other people and how to correctly move on from here.

As I met 2 of my old classmates yesterday, we happened to talk about stuff that we do not really talk about since we never met for the last few years or so. Time flies...

As one of them told me about her experiences...I cannot help but marvel at her...

Staying in hall, doing multiple CCAs...doing social work, and graduating with honours.

That really made me look like crap when I think about myself. I learnt a harsh lesson about challenging myself to new limits. Stress is necessary, but what I learnt yesterday is that I have to effectively use stress to my advantage.

And also, I have to practise a lot more on time management, and also on diplomacy and etc...Time to brush up on them.

I also discovered that for myself, the key critical thing is to realise that I do not have much time to do what I really want to do...so I must now prioritise and decide the things which I can properly devote myself in...and enjoy what I love to do...in that manner, I can remove some of my pessimism and stay happy.

So for the million dollar question for me is: What career should I pursue...?

I am stuck at 2 choices now, but I cannot decide on which one is really the one which I should do...I guess I do not have much time left to think about this...that's a worry.

Also, I guess I need to end off Rag properly. I realised that especially since I did not make it in time to see the dancers perform yesterday that I must understand one crucial point: I have indeed done my very best for Rag.

Indeed, to have given 3 years of my life for Arts Rag is the most massive commitment that I have done for any project ever. I can safely say that save my job, I cannot have that passion to do for any other project that I will get involved in in the future, maybe forever.

Arts Rag has now become etched inseperably from the happy part of my university life: dreams that I thought were not possible were finally realised everytime I join Rag and see it through as part of the happy family that I know called Raggers.

Rag 2004 - Realisation of the last Rag with the seniors who have done it all since Dragon Rag.

Rag 2005 - Completion of a new breakthrough concept under the worst of all circumstances.

Rag 2006 - The best float that I have been in, Arts has ever seen for now, and justifiably one that will be the benchmark for all other Rags to surpass...

With that, I leave Rag with the happy memories and all...I am raggerfied.

Rag 2006: The run up, the day itself, afterthoughts...and a lot more

This post is critical to me because it carries special significance regarding Rag itself. Whatever that happened for Rag especially yesterday decides my course of action from here on...

The final week of Rag 2006 had a intensive run up, and mine started when I came back last Sunday afternoon to help out with the touch up of the bingo machine. With my main task being to ensure that the lorry for the float was ready for mounting as and when Lionel wanted, it was a relief when I managed to get it here when me and Jianwu got it here on Monday morning. But the story did not end there of course. When the lorry itself broke down on Thursday, my heart sank. That meant that the plans to mount the float were delayed. Things were made worse when it rained from Monday all the way to Friday morning.

When all these problems were finally resolved, we thought we had combated the worst case scenarios that our float could experience. We thought that all that was left was to carry out according to plan and we will get the rewards that Arts Rag was long overdue to get.

But, yesterday, it did not happen.

Arts Rag 2006 ended up with nothing.

Best float presentation ended up with Medicine, float design to Business, and overall float to SDE.

If you want to know my response to this, I am very very bitter with them, as with all fellow raggers.

Medicine - It is damn obvious that a big chunk of the dancers that performed were NOT students of Medicine faculty in NUS. This is so blatant because of the fact that the dance moves that these dancers performed compared to the students themselves were different and of a much higher level, even better than the halls themselves.

Business - Their main float design was haphazard to say the least when I saw them come in, and there was just no way that they could be in contention to win it all. I was sure that we had the best chance of winning this because our main float was indeed the best of the faculties as ours was the really pure 3-D strucuture of them all. A political move? I cannot say, but it sure has some connections with something else somewhere...

SDE - I am really very very gutted. Simply because they used last year's design and theme and copied wholesale. Period. And yet they won. I am sure this result has greatly insulted all other faculties, not just Arts.

The only thing that I can be comforted is that these results, because of the controversy behind them all, will not end on Saturday. At least I am assured by a friend of mine that it will not be. In any case, I am thinking of making my voice known to all in campus the double standards of NUSSU and the validity of the results.

All of us were in tears when the results were released.

Yuimin, Gerri, Wenhui broke down on the spot. Jasmine tried to hold back but couldn't do so either. Lionel broke down too when he gave his debrief. Michelle and Xinyu, 2 of the best freshies to have helped Rag, cried inconsolably.
Jianwu cried too as well... In a word, no senior ragger was not in tears, except for Hock who had to help put up a strong front for us all.

As for me, I just could not hold back my tears when it all sunk in when all hope for any result was lost.

3 years of Rag.

All came down to this day, I thought when I embarked on this trip for the 3rd time over.

All of us sacrificed so much of our time to make Arts Rag 2006 work. And when it really worked, we were overjoyed because we knew we did all we could and it came out as perfect as we wanted it to be.

Still, some words that a few of us said are critical in emphasising what Rag 2006 meant to us all.

Lionel - " The feeling of having a winning rag because we did everything we could as one..."

Gerri - " We do it because we come back when others keep knocking us down, so that we can all prove a point to the rest..."

Jasmine - "The best Rag for me personally for my 4 years..."

The pain of Rag.

I asked myself, what more must we do to prove out point that Arts Rag is a force to be reckoned with...

Then I came up with this conclusion late yesterday night: Arts Rag 2006 will be known to me as the champion float that was robbed of victory in the most ridiculous of circumstances.

So comes the question: Will anyone take up the mantle of Rag and push for next year?

As I talked to Michelle before leaving, she promised that she will redress the injustice suffered yesterday by doing next year. And I know that she is not the only one.

As for Rag 2006, it fully symbolised the motto of Rag: Passion, Friendships, Triumph.

Passion - The belief that we knew that we had a winning float, and we worked on it 8 months back and finished it on schedule and performed it the way we wanted it to be in our dreams.

Friendships - Strong bonds were created among seniors and freshmen on the very cause of making a good Rag. We crapped, ate, slept, bled and shed tears, but all united the name of doing up the Rag that symbolised our dreams and bonds.

Triumph - Even as Arts did not win, we won the respect of other faculties, halls, and a lot more. Other faculties saluted us for our monster of a float that even stood up to the halls even. I overheard people from other faculties looking at us with envy as they walked past out float. We walked out of Rag day as a real force to be reckoned with at the end...

For me, this moment is poignant.

Simply for the fact that this is the last Rag that I could help out actively. This time, next year, I will working elsewhere to get some job experience.

But if that's the way I have to end off my bond with Rag, then so be it.

Because I have no regrets in doing it, and I will never do for the rest of my life.

If you are not a ragger, it is simply not possible for you to realise how me and fellow Raggers feel now. Simply because it is no ordinary project. This is the only one which teaches you how you should see things in life: With commitment, dignity, respect and love for what you want to do.

For me, the process of Raggerification has undergone a new meaning...and I am thankful for being part of Rag 2006. Simply because I am allowed to be part of this and relive the true meaning of Rag yet again.

Be Raggerfied.